Joke for the day

Jokes and funny stories

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crazyhorse
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Re: Joke for the day

Postby crazyhorse » Sun Apr 16, 2017 12:26 am

A little 10-year-old girl was walking home, alone, from school one day, when a big man on a black motorcycle pulls up beside her.
After following along for a while, turns to her and asks,

Hey there little girl, do you want to go for a ride?

NO says the little girl as she keeps on walking.

The motorcyclist again pulls up beside her and asks, Hey little girl, I will give you $10 if you hop on the back.

NO says the little girl again as she hurries down the street.

The motorcyclist pulls up beside the little girl again and says,

Okay kid, my last offer! I'll give you 20 Bucks and a big bag of candy if you just hop on the back of my bike.

Finally, the little girl stops and turns towards him and screams out...

Look Dad, you're the one who bought the Honda instead of the Harley ...


YOU RIDE IT!! :D

crazyhorse
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Re: Joke for the day

Postby crazyhorse » Sun Apr 16, 2017 12:28 am

We have a new grocery store in our area. When you approach the produce section you hear thunder and a fine mist rains down on the produce with an aroma is released of a fresh spring day. When you approach the meat isle you hear cows mooing and the aroma of charcoal steaks and onions fills the air. As you approach the egg area, you can hear hens clucking and smell bacon and eggs frying.

I don't buy toilet paper there anymore.... :D

crazyhorse
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Re: Joke for the day

Postby crazyhorse » Fri May 05, 2017 4:23 am

Cow Cop: Do u know why I bulled you over?

Cow: A mooving violation?

Cow Cop: Erratic steering!

Cow: That's udderly ridiculous.

Cow Cop: Don't give me no beef. :D

:fr: :fr: :fr: :fr:

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dudingbos
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Re: Joke for the day

Postby dudingbos » Sun Aug 13, 2017 2:11 pm

Four guys are at a high school reunion and one of them goes to the restroom. The other three guys start talking about how succesful their sons are. Guy 1: My son is so successful he owns a cardealership and just gave his best friend a Ferarri. Guy 2: Thats nothing, my son owns an airliner and just gave his best friend a private jet Guy 3: Well my son is more success than that, he owns an architecture firm and just gave his best friend a castle Guy 4 walks out of the bathroom and walks over to the other 3 guys Guy 4: Hey guys what are we talking about Guy 1: Oh, we are talking about how successful our sons are Guy 4:Well, my son is a Gay stripper Guy 2: You must be so dissappointed with what he's done with his life Guy 4: Actually, he is doing very well for himself. He just got a Ferrari, a jet, and a castle from his three boyfriends.

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dudingbos
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Re: Joke for the day

Postby dudingbos » Mon Aug 14, 2017 3:04 pm

Here's another one:
If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to hear it...
...then my illegal logging business is a success.

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dudingbos
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Re: Joke for the day

Postby dudingbos » Tue Aug 15, 2017 6:54 am

Aaaand another one. It would be great if other people than me would reply, though :D

Where does a horse go when it gets sick?
To the horse-pital.
Haha, nah, just kidding, it gets shot.

crazyhorse
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Re: Joke for the day

Postby crazyhorse » Wed Aug 16, 2017 11:46 pm

What new crop did the farmer plant?
(Beets me!)
Why shouldn't you tell a secret on a farm?
(Because the potatoes have eyes and the corn has ears!)

Farmers earn a meager celery, come home beet and just want to read the pepper, turn-ip the covers, en-dive into bed!)

What did the baby corn say to the mama corn?
(Where's pop?)

Why did the cabbage win the race?
(Because it was ahead!)

Why was the cucumber mad?
(Because it was in a pickle. :D

:fr: :fr: :fr: :fr:


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